I tend to agree with kazimoto..you are whining about what others think and view you and i'd love to hear the answer you would give for the guery he asked.."Would you rather be ugly and can't attract a man? " Get your shine on girl!!

I had misunderstood your problem so i came the wrong conclusions. Now that everything is a bit more clearer i would like to thank you for wasting my time with your non-issue. I am really really beautiful and every man i meet wants to sleep with me! Since when is that a problem? It's called life, you play the cards you are dealt. Would you rather be ugly and can't attract a man?
Look you cannot control what is in the minds of others. Whining about other peoples intentions with you will get you nowhere. If you find that the people you hang out with only appreciate you for your looks, stop hanging around them. Befriend blind people who will appreciate you for something other than what you look like.
Finally since you know this first hand, don't go around judging others by what they look like, right? Just live your life!

u shud endeavor to live your life for uaself en please yourself only. the more u try to make very other person happy or see life from your perspective, the more u'll get frustrated. ua conscious shud be your best judge en then learn to appreciate everything that happens to you, it has a significant.

Kazi moto, thanks for your answers and views but u got me all wrong. am not saying i look like her, but beyonce of destiny's child is a classic example. she oozes sex appeal and wuld easily be mistaken for a slut....but apparently she aint. apparently she is born again, doesnt drink etc etc. am in that kinda situation.......i ooze sex appeal but am not a slut....( i look like one though).so my furstration has been with guys who just make me feel like a peice of meat. i would never brag about a priest hitting on me......i felt really bad about that and it really hurt me that even a priest would hit on me unprovoked!! its not like i wore trashily to church, i was just kawa. anyways av learnt how to handle it. and thank God that i have met someone who respects me for what i am and doesnt pressure me for shag. its unfortunate i had to give in to no strings attached. the guy in question was just a peice of old shit. he used to disrespect me and my body acting like its body parts his dealing with....only for him to fall for me later. i just decided am not gonna give him the benefit of me and my inner beauty. he only wanted p**** and thats what he got. too bad that he fell he shulda seen that coming...when he was hitting on me i wanted more but he told me to f*** off if i wont unleash. @ the time i was depressed and am like ok cool.....then when he fell for me i told him to f*** off as i only want a no strings attached. that felt good......am not being sadistic...dont mind my language, i dont usually curse.anyways after all is said and done i have to admit that i was wrong in my attitude. u can be sexy and still someone finds u chaste. am so glad i found someone who respects me for me and doesnt mind me being outgoing and all. i regret the time i wasted rejecting the very essence of me i.e. sex appeal. infact i used to wish i looked more of a good gal. but nao av learnt to accept it and in as muxh as i might get misjudged or mistaken, its ok, i cant please everyone. bythe way doesnt esther wahome ooze of sex appeal? yet she is a gospel singer......my attitude was totally wrong.and i think the guy i end up with will be very lucky as am a one stop shop....

I really congratulate you for your courage to bring out the real feelings of every woman. When I read your question i saw a woman who needs to be appreciated for who she really is and not what she could be. that is not only a womans greatest need but its the greatest need of every human being- appreciation. now lets get down to your question. men and women are very different in the way they see and respond to things. the greatest driving force for the men is sex. it is a very positive drive. its what really makes men want to pursue progress and raise to greater heights. all the male games are designed such that it includes a rush of adrenalin and the need to win and celebrate. thats why a woman will never understand her husbands one week depression when Manchester united looses a game. now what men see in you is your body figures and since you are outgoing and friendly they feel the rush to want to accomplish something with you. but again thats good because once you are out of sight they forget that you ever existed and look up to the other chicks. now thats how life is. women on the other hand cherish and truly crave for the innermost appreciation and deep understanding of who they really are. affection is the overriding need or women and any man who hasn't learn't the art of affection will never really get down with our lovely sisters. thats what you are asking for. and you know what girl, you are right, you need to be seen like you are, a nice level headed amd good person. you don't have any problem, you only need to start appreciating the differences between men and women. you can try these: dress decently and behave modestly. while you party alot, try as much as possible to to hang around respectable and modest people who never over do anything. never over drink or speak words that may be perceived to mean loose. be a the outgoing woman that you are but do it such that all people will have a different perspective that you can reckon with. again you will realize that if you really want a change in your life then you will have to start doing things differently. just look deeper into you life and make the necessary adjustments and maintain your strengths. that way you will live you life fully. realize that you are not meant to be without a man because God definitely created a nice man for you. and you know what you will find him very soon. you will realize that as much as he will fall head over heels for your body he will fall in love with you as a person and really cherish your companionship and respect your sexuality. these men are there and you will get yours. all the best my good sister. BILL.

I reread your question and had to post another answer. This time i'm going to be a bit more harsh but it's for your own good. You ooze sex apeal and look like a great shag because it's the image you present to the world. It's not unfortunate, it's very intentional on your part. The signs are all there in your post, 'a great shag', 'look like i can make a guy holler in bed'. You don't seem offended that someone would describe you that way. You seem to be bragging abut a priest hitting on you!
Remember what i wrote before about birds of a feather? Well let me let u in on something; no one. absolutetly no one, goes to a club or with the intention of finding a husband or a wife. Everyone there is looking for sex, nothing more. That's why people outgrow them, you rarely find people in their 40's there. Anyone you find there expects you will give it up easy.
So let's be honest here, you don't really want a boyfriend, do you? I know you say you do but you really don't. You found someone who clearly wanted more than just 'no strings attached' but apparently he's not you type, is he?

Gal,let me furst start with some correction,defination of a bad gal doesn't necessarily state u r easy to give in,that defines being loose.Am a bad gal(in my own way) n don give it up easily.Being bad or good doesn't really define who u are.Being a paarty animal doesn't say u r bad inside,u can party all night and be one cool,domesticated person.Take it as a strength and not a weakness,some chiq wuold die to be like you,outgoing and the like,but they aren't created with the same personality like you.Just appreciate who u are.
And u don have to shag someone to feel good about urself.U will end up feeling....bad about it.Just remember men are different from us chiqs,they see a HOT she(like u),they start a 3D search on u,mpaka how it would be in bed,if only they cud have a piece of ur life.
So,just be who u r,u cannot change who u r,or u can do is live positively and maybe try and be the good gal inside.Let her be seen and known,give her a chance to shine too.Balance the bad and good,thats what i try to do everyday of my life.

PS:Lesbo is not an option,u don wanna go there,right!?

Well people just have sex appeal regardless of how they wear or the way they carry themselves....but as for me i think theirs npthing wrong with you, its one of your strong points and all you have to do is work on your weak points so as you bring em to balance. Search for em who aint after you coz of sex , get one who is a party animal and who will respect you for who u r and u wont have to be bothered by em who see you as a piece of meat since u'l' be partying together..like me!hehehe!
Hit me up!

Birds of a feather flock together! It's the reason why you only seem to attract that kind of guy, because they seem to think you are that kind of guy. I'm not calling you a slut or a hoe but maybe something about you seems to tell them that you are like that. So maybe it's time for a change. You've said it yourself that 'deep down your just a good girl'. But a light hidden under a bush cannot be seen, so bring that good girl out, let everyone see her. Or are you afraid that no one will like you if you're a nice girl? Or you won't be as popular or have as much fun if you aren't a party animal?